Jest Out of Jurisdiction
Law Enforcement / First Responder stories and experiences with a focus on comedic blunders, events, and the lighter side of stressful jobs. Stories are firsthand accounts told by the hosts Flash and T-Dot with accompanying guest interviews.
Jest Out of Jurisdiction
Jump Street
Step into the world of 1980s policing through the eyes of Mark Reiber, a former Cincinnati officer whose career reads like a Hollywood script. From posing as a high school student to bust drug dealers to chasing suspects featured on America's Most Wanted, Mark's stories transport us to an era of policing that simply doesn't exist anymore.
Music underneath it, the, the awning just getting out of the weather, so that creek is over there. Mill street right there, that it was it Street right there. It was rolling, it was getting after it and we look over the neighbors there that called it in. I said where's he at? And I looked he was on his back skiing, holding on to a pipe that went across for plumbing and just clapping on top of it.
Speaker 2:I've never seen anything like that in my life, not a stitch. And they couldn't keep on him. Ah, he was drunk, probably on meth, but this guy was just drunk and he was. I mean, he was, it was just he was bouncing that water like he was skiing, like a top water jig. I looked at Eric. I was like, oh my gosh, look at that. And Darrell and him came over. You know they jumped the creek trying to get to him. I was like, no, let him go, he's having too much fun.
Speaker 2:I think he'd end up at Laurel Lake. That's a good possibility. They got him out of there. I was like gosh, he's still naked. They would take him up to PD. He'd cut his head just jumping in. We had him bandaged up and we didn't have clothes on him yet and one of the deputies came in. He's like oh gosh. And his woman was his dispatcher. She said get him covered up before she sees that she don't want to come home with me. I was like yeah. I'm home with me tonight.
Speaker 2:I was like, yeah, but that's kind of the stuff here that we try to keep it lighthearted. I know some of our podcasts we get into some serious stuff, but we'll just go wherever you want to go.
Speaker 5:It's fun. Yeah, just ask me anything. You're free to ask me anything. I'll just tell you no if I can't answer. That's fine, just make something up alright, you guys ready.
Speaker 4:Alright, welcome back. We've got another episode for you. We're putting them out regularly again. It's kind of nice. I hope everybody's enjoying them. So far We've got me and T-Dots here. Doug's back with us again.
Speaker 2:He's a fixture. He's a fixture now.
Speaker 4:He's on the payroll, the non-existent payroll. The man of the hour is Mark Ryber. I hope I said that right. You did, nailed it.
Speaker 2:Nailed it. Nailed it he practiced that all day.
Speaker 4:Yeah, and Ryber, you're from Ohio.
Speaker 5:Correct. Yeah, cincinnati I work. If anybody knows like going northbound, southbound 75, it's exit 12, but where between the walls are. If you've ever been stuck between those walls on 75 south, just past GE, that's the area where I lived and worked.
Speaker 4:Okay.
Speaker 2:Is that Hamilton, hamilton County?
Speaker 5:Yeah, Hamilton County. It's the first city outside of Cincinnati.
Speaker 2:Everybody from this area knows Hamilton, so many people moved up.
Speaker 4:Yeah, Doug sent me your resume. He said it was a boring resume. Mark sent it.
Speaker 3:Oh you sent it.
Speaker 4:So he just copied and pasted it.
Speaker 2:I was like, yeah, that's definitely not a boring resume.
Speaker 4:But so is law enforcement. All you've done, you started in law enforcement.
Speaker 5:All you've done, you started in law enforcement yeah, I started when I think I was the name in the youngest Ohio I had at the time, because I found a law that before they wouldn't let you take the test, he were 21. And then I pointed out, like you know, you can take the test but you can't be certified higher to your 21. So I was able to get in before that.
Speaker 4:So, yeah, I was pretty much got into this young man. That's a good, that's a good loophole wish I'd have been able to do that now.
Speaker 3:Now mark the way, the, the way you get. Uh, you know, far as your certification in ohio goes, it's a little bit different in Kentucky, I think. I mean you can go ahead and like go to academy before you're ever hired with the agency, is that right?
Speaker 5:You're correct. Yeah, and I did that. In fact, I went to a place called Scarlet Oaks Academy, but they actually were able to do that in high school, but once again, you couldn't get hired until you were 21, but they wouldn't even take, like you, take the test to your 21. Yeah, so, but I, but I took the uh, uh, the. I got to the academy when I was, when I was 21, like january. No, maybe I was, I don't know, 20 has been so long ago. I graduated january. I turned 21 in march, or maybe I turned 22, I don't know. Whatever it was, but anyway, I was able to get in early and so, yeah, I think I started 82 82.
Speaker 2:I got just to go to academy.
Speaker 5:So I went and did that and that's it.
Speaker 4:Left college I got you so you got your Academy and your certification before you ever got with an agency.
Speaker 5:Yes, well, you had to get somebody to back you, which is like I think they call the word sponsor. You had to sponsor you. So I found some little department that they made me come in on the weekends on occasion and dispatch, with no training, no, nothing. I'd answer the phone, go on the radio and tell somebody where to go. It was like really no training whatsoever.
Speaker 4:That's a job that I would never want to do.
Speaker 5:There's no way I'd want to do this and we worked out of a trailer. They just started, but they worked out of a trailer, oh wow.
Speaker 2:Like a double wide or single wide type. It was single wide, it was trailer oh wow, like a double wide or single wide type. It was single wide, single wide, but yeah, I never heard of that one. But a new agency. I guess they're trying to get one started up, or or did y'all burn down or something oh, maybe I was under construction.
Speaker 5:I wasn't there that long, but yeah, it was definitely out of a trailer that's pretty awesome wow so uh.
Speaker 4:So what got you started? What? What started the itch to get into law enforcement?
Speaker 5:uh, well, you know it's funny. Uh, I was in high school senior year and some guy came back who was from my, my school, and he had had a nice career in the fbi and I was always a numbers guy. So I was like when I talked to well, you know, you need to hire more accountants than they do. They do detectives. That's what he told me back then and I said okay. So I thought, well, you got to do four years in college before you get the FBI. So that's why I started college. But then I started riding around with a, with a, a guy I knew from alington High School's department, a neighboring community, and he used to let me ride around on third shift with him and I just kind of caught the bug doing that.
Speaker 4:Awesome.
Speaker 3:That's the way most of us are, yeah.
Speaker 4:Just takes one ride along.
Speaker 2:I had no idea if I liked it or not rode with Daryl's aunt. Fell in love, fell in love. Now I got a little car sick, but still I was like, yeah, I could do this. Yeah, it was this guy too.
Speaker 5:He also, he, uh, had a community of I don't know maybe a thousand people. I mean, the whole town wasn't more than half mile wide and long and it wasn't even that wide. Um, and but he, he, they called him, uh, what was it? Five, something. I forget what the numbers were. Basically, anywhere there was anything in the county, he would go to it, he would run everywhere. He didn't care about jurisdiction. He got a call somewhere Because his little town had Just out of jurisdiction.
Speaker 2:Yeah, all of New.
Speaker 3:Heights was a pretty calm little town, best I can remember.
Speaker 5:Yes, I mean I think they had four red lights. Yeah, I, I mean it was the they. I think they had, uh, four red lights. Yeah, I mean it was like mayberry really and they were all on one street, so outside of that they didn't have any red lights, that's awesome, it really was mayberry yeah yeah, yeah.
Speaker 5:So I wrote with him and kind of got the bug out after that and I said I was already in in college for it anyway. But then I had to go to the academy and the rest is history, I guess how many, how many years total did you, did you do?
Speaker 2:are you still doing it?
Speaker 5:no, I've been gone a long time. Uh gosh, I've been almost on this 30 years, 28 years, I don't even know. Yeah, 20. I guess it is going on 28 years, yeah, but well, fun story though. I'll tell you this though, I wound up getting fired and won my job back. Oh yeah, no, that's good. And I won my job back, and they pretty much paid me the last eight years not to work.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you can't beat that. No, you can't, I need that gig.
Speaker 5:True story. They fired me and I wanted my job back and then that day before I had the police chief arrested, I had that in my pocket and on some custom office charges and had him arrested. So then I go in the meeting next day and say where's the chief? And he's like don't start that shit.
Speaker 2:I'm sorry. Sorry about that. No, you're good. You're good. We're rated.
Speaker 5:M or whatever I usually mark explicit on most of our stuff just to CYA, you're good, yeah. So they pretty much came back out and said, okay, I gave them a number and they said and all I did was the math like okay, I was only making about $30,000 a year. I had eight years to go. I figured $10,000 to pay my attorney and I was like, okay, give me $250,000 and I quit.
Speaker 4:They said okay, that's a good deal yeah.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's why can't that happen?
Speaker 4:yeah, I don't know you wouldn't love it, you don't?
Speaker 5:have enough time to go on the whole story of that thing sounds complicated yeah, I'd like to hear it at some point in time.
Speaker 2:It sounds yeah, that's a good story me and dylan just looked at each other like there's, there is a big story with behind. I'm like my whole ADHD brain came. I'm like this is what happened. This is what happened. I've thought of 15 things since you said that I was like man, I'm just going to let it go.
Speaker 5:Well, the short story is basically you saw some of my crazy cop stories on Facebook and I pretty much got the word out. I was going to lock up every one of them, and every one of their councilman's kids too, and they knew I wouldn't take any prisoners. They knew that I had to write somebody for going 26 and 25. I didn't care.
Speaker 4:That's awesome, that's awesome. So it was the. Hamilton County Sheriff's Office that you started with.
Speaker 5:Yes, they went to Lachlan.
Speaker 4:Okay, and then Lachlan, let's see.
Speaker 2:Yeah, tell us about some of them, but somewhere in there.
Speaker 5:I don't know how, because I was terrible in high school but I was really good at taking those police civil service tests and I was like a free agent. After I left the Sheriff's Department I could have went to four different places. I finished first on a bunch of tests but I chose Locker because that was my hometown and they were also the third highest paying in Hemerick County at that time.
Speaker 4:Well, you know, I've worked with some highly educated officers, and the ones that are not as book smart but are more common sense usually turn out to be better officers.
Speaker 2:Oh 100% book smart, but are more common sense, usually turn out to be better officers. So that's oh 100. Yes, so something doesn't um book smart always. It didn't always relate to the to what we deal with every day.
Speaker 4:No, common sense and street smarts helps you a whole lot better out there. Oh, that wins every time. So once, once you were with the hamilton county sheriff's office. How long was it before you started doing detective work, or when you went to lachlan, I guess?
Speaker 5:well, let's get back to county real quick. So I in my resume I sent you, I called I did 30 days, okay, and back then you had to do like five years in the jail before you even you had a chance to get on the road.
Speaker 4:Wow.
Speaker 5:So that's where they started.
Speaker 4:You're kind of like starting out as a bailiff, but they started you out in corrections, okay.
Speaker 5:Yeah, correct, you had to do your five years in there and they would only hire from the jail, so they wouldn't hire from anybody from another community. That was the only way to go through and it was a long, long wait. This, that was the only way to go through and it was a long, long wait. And this is kind of funny. So I'm moving one day and been here 30 days and oh what, even 30 days and and I get a call where I've got some friends helping me move and the guy says, yeah, this is captain hinky, my home county sheriff's department. I'm gonna come up here to the county and talk to me about a special assignment. And I'm like, yeah, screw you, I'm moving. I ain't got time for that crap Because I thought it was one of the guys from jail messing with me and I hung up on him.
Speaker 5:Phone rings back. He goes listen, listen, I know, I know I get it. Those guys are full pranks all the time. But listen, it's Saturday and I'm here at the headquarters and he gave me a number and said call that number, ask for me, and I'm working today and I never work on Saturday. I said okay. So I called the number and the guy answered the phone, I said, yes, captain Hinky, and they said, no, he doesn't work on Hold on a second. I think he is here today. And then that same voice picked up. I like, oh my gosh, I just told the captain, you know, blow off. Yeah, that's the way I started out that interview process. And so he called me up and said they're starting this special thing.
Speaker 5:I don't know if you guys ever seen the movie 21 jumps 3. Oh, yeah, well, I actually did that back in 82. That was 20. I was 22 at the time and they sent me to Taft High School in downtown Cincinnati. So you were having to pose as a high school student. Yeah, well, yeah, I mean I do anything. Get out of jail. I mean I like do something, yeah, but I've only been there 30 days already, hated it, but how can you think about it? You're choosing to live in jail. Yeah, yeah, so, anyway, so, uh, uh, anyway, I interviewed with a couple other people and and, uh, they put me in this unit and I went back to that task. Now this is another story. So so it was, san Francisco was probably 90% black and I was the only person in one of my classes and for the senior class. I mean, they all thought I was a cop and uh, they actually voted me sergeant of arms for the damn senior class.
Speaker 2:Did you pass? Did you? Did you walk the line?
Speaker 5:no, no, no. So I was like this ain't working out very well. And there was another area that supplied the school there. That was a white section that Pete Rose was from, down by Sedano Park. So I was trying to get with those guys. But I was stuck on this other side and I need to do something here because this ain't working out. I don't want to go back to the jail.
Speaker 5:So I played on quarterback in high school. So I went there and this staff they didn't even have a home football field. They played all their way games Well, I think, quarterback high school. So I'm out there tossing the ball on the coast of Salas's hey, you go score here. I'm like, yeah, he said you won't play us. I don't know. I said my last time I played a coach was an asshole, you could talk like that there too. And the next thing I'm out there practicing with him and then find out a week later the coach there, the sergeant, calls me and says did you join the football team? I'm like, yeah, I'm not going to play. And he goes what are you doing? I'm like, well, I need to get in. But it's funny because they called me the white senator because I was the only white guy on the football team and they gave me a jersey. Once everybody saw me at school with the jersey I was in. And so then they said what are you going to do? I said, well, sergeant, let's do this Because we had a back story.
Speaker 5:I had to go to another city and learn all about a place called Beaver Creek, ohio. I knew some of the teachers' names, the principal, where all the kids hung out, the radio station Just in case you meet somebody, you've got to know your back story. And so we got up there because we had a fake report card, I guess you call it. So they put down that I failed the fourth quarter of the year before, so I wasn't eligible to play Smooth. But I still go to a game. And the coach they hadn't won a game in seven years and he brought my stuff. He's like we don't care if we forfeit or we form, we want to win a game. Well, I took the bus to the game and he had me out there pre-game taking snaps. I'm like I can't do this, I'm gonna get arrested or something out of this no, I'm not.
Speaker 4:I'm not doing that you get them disqualified completely from competing at all.
Speaker 5:I'm not doing that yeah, so anyway, so, uh, anyway. After that, though, I was going, because everyone, because everyone thought, yeah, that's the right guy, he's got a gun, you know an arm, and everybody in the community thought I was on the football team, but I never played a game, I only went to practice for two and a half weeks I've seen a movie, I think it's called Never Been Kissed. No 21 Jump Street.
Speaker 2:Oh I know, but they also Never Been Kissed. Kissed it was Drew Barrymore and somebody, and that guy really did go out and play baseball. He was like 30. Pretended to be, a high school kid Glory days.
Speaker 4:In that operation. So what were you all trying to uncover, Was it?
Speaker 5:marijuana sales. Yeah, uncover was it. Was it marijuana sales? Yeah, yeah, back then it was mostly marijuana sales. Uh, it was, you know, just trying to get the actually adults who were selling the kids and we wound up. I think I wound up arresting 45 50 the first year, wow so was it the teachers were selling to students, or was it? No, no, no, no, no, no. But you know, the kids know everything. If you're a kid, you're like, hey, if I want to get some pot work somebody will take you okay and you wind up buying from adults.
Speaker 5:Usually you know um, but uh yeah, we did that. In the second year I went to colerain high school and that was pretty much an all-white community and there I knocked out about 50 something arrested. But then we were buying cocaine and LSD there too.
Speaker 4:Wow, they had the harder stuff over there. Yeah yeah, it was just a year different.
Speaker 5:Koi loads, koi loads.
Speaker 3:The loads, yeah, loads was big back in the day yeah. Man.
Speaker 2:And you were how old when you you did this the second time I did. I was 23 years old and I passed as a junior so you I read this right you were a senior first and then that's awesome and then, like, well, and during that time I well, actually the first day of school, the first year, my first daughter was born.
Speaker 5:I think it was that morning and I think I went right from the high school, right, or right from the hospital, to the school. You're talking about feeling old, no kidding.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 5:And then in the second year my second daughter was born and I needed some time off, so I went and grabbed the fire extinguisher, squirted it all over the place and I got suspended on purpose for something.
Speaker 4:So was it an actual suspension? Did they actually rot you one out, or is it?
Speaker 5:No, the guy who suspended me didn't know the principal didn't even know. The superintendent knew. Was that the only?
Speaker 3:ones privy to that information was just the superintendent, and then the agency itself.
Speaker 5:Well, the first one, the principal knew. The second one, the superintendent knew.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's awesome.
Speaker 4:That suspended. And then the second one. The superintendent knew Okay, that's awesome, you got suspended.
Speaker 5:And then the second one. I actually got busted because there was a counselor, because I switched from a vocational park because I ran too early kids there, so I went to the actual high school park. They were connected, though, and what was it? One of the prosecutor's dad that's what it was was, uh, the counselor there and he did some checking. He goes, he called me, he goes. I don't know what's going on, but you don't say where you say you live and what are you talking about? Because I checked on it, you don't live there. And I was like, right, give me the phone. I had to call my sergeant. I said you need to make a phone call, and then the superintendent calls back to that counselor's office and said okay, let it go.
Speaker 4:Is that the only time that your cover got blown? Yeah?
Speaker 5:that was it. That was it. That's awesome, although you know back in the day. I hope my kids never listen to this podcast. But you know at your undercover you're allowed to smoke pot. I mean, there was cases like you know, like I don't know if you heard actually down in Miami, I understand there was a case where somebody come in and say, hey, you're not a cop, you'll snort this cocaine Right, and so it was life or death situation so you're allowed to.
Speaker 5:So, uh, I'm out one night with this guy. He goes hey, we're gonna buy this hawaiian sensimedia gold. I'm like, man, that's the reagent, that's gotta be pretty good stuff and we go by it. So I would fake it all the time. You know you'd fake, you know, yeah, and pass it back to him. And that guy was looking at me. He said you didn't hit that. Like what are you talking about? He goes you didn't hit that. I was like, uh, oh, I'm caught. Then he called me a derogatory female name, yeah, and I said give it to me. And this stuff was the best stuff I've ever seen. I dropped him off. I had to call my partner Come pick me up at Wendy's. I had two singles, two fries, oh my goodness.
Speaker 2:That's awesome.
Speaker 5:Stop by the store and eat some Doritos and some bunions. Oh, I seriously I couldn't drive. I mean it made me need it's almost like it was just, I mean it was floating stuff gotta do what you gotta do went and got him a crave case white castle when you went home, I said man, we need to test this stuff. It's the best stuff I ever had well, when you went home, did, donna?
Speaker 3:I remember telling him. I said man, we need to test this stuff.
Speaker 5:This is the best stuff I ever had. Well, when you went home, did Donna notice anything different about you?
Speaker 5:Oh it's forever ago, because he had to take me back to our undercover headquarters. I had to log me in because every night was overtime. Yeah, in fact, at one point they called me and told me to start taking comp time because I was going to make more than the sheriff. Because you know you're a kid, you're out there, I'm working. I'll tell you, seven days a week, 15 hours a day. You know you're out, you go to school, I'm driving a half hour through school and then you got through school and then you go out and party with the kids.
Speaker 2:Plus you got football practice.
Speaker 5:Yeah, party with the kids. Plus, you got football practice, yeah right. And then you got to go back to your undercover place and log the evidence in, write the report and get them to go home until midnight.
Speaker 4:So how did it work with school work and assignments and things? Did the teachers not start catching on when you weren't turning things in, or was it?
Speaker 5:No, I put overtime in for doing homework.
Speaker 3:That's awesome, that's commitment. Yeah, that is.
Speaker 4:That is commitment.
Speaker 2:Did your wife get in, because you know she was the one doing it.
Speaker 5:Yeah, she would have got too good a grade because you had to miss a bunch of task. You had to miss a bunch of, but it's funny though, I did learn how to type my second time too, because I didn't know how to type when I finished high school.
Speaker 2:What grade are you in? 14th, that is awesome. Should have went to Votek while you were in there welding or something.
Speaker 5:I forgot what I was supposed to say. The one I was taking perineum in the second time. The first time I don't remember what I was taking. I was like I started out vocational and then they switched me over. So you get to know both kids, but vocational kids were always in more trouble than the regular kids. That's just life. Then they switched me over. So you get to know both kids, but vocational kids, usually we're always in more trouble than the regular kids.
Speaker 4:That's just life that's fun I don't think they do operations like that. I try.
Speaker 2:Well, I set up a scene anymore because all the social media.
Speaker 5:If you don't have a past, then what's gonna believe who you are?
Speaker 2:well, that's true, you would have to really fabricate some, some social media background and the closest I ever got to any 21 jump street stuff was me and joe that we had a horrible time with some pot sales in the school. I was working and he was like this kid. I got him and busted him a little bit. I said man, I called the detective. I said I can get more here at school. We got to stop this. He said all right. He said there's enough cameras in them schools. Just make sure he doesn't go in a bathroom or somewhere off camera that we can do this. So I prepped this kid. I was like just meet in the hallway, do a quick exchange and go straight in the bathroom. But that's what you get when you I'm done yeah.
Speaker 2:so we made the bus and I didn't charge the kid, I just went and said hey, I know what you did, don't do it no more. So it was I swung and missed. There you go what do you?
Speaker 5:do they hardly ever go as planned? No, not at all.
Speaker 2:Especially with the clientele I was dealing with. You can't go to the special classes and do that stuff.
Speaker 4:They don't follow directions as well. No, it was fun After your 21 Jump Street. What did you get into after that?
Speaker 5:I went back to my little hometown of Lackland back then that was like 84, end of 84. And just started doing regular patrol work.
Speaker 2:I bet that was kind of hard to go from detective work starting off to back on the road a little bit. I mean adjustment.
Speaker 5:Well, for me it wasn't back on the road. I went from the jail to the tech, so being on the road was new for me. I like it, it was fun. I always thought it was good when you work in your hometown. It was for me starting out because I knew literally everyone. I knew most of people's parents and grandparents. Half a lot was from Mount Vernon, that's true.
Speaker 3:That's right.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I mean we had Sterns and Fosters there and they brought so many people up there for jobs.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they went up there for P&G Right.
Speaker 5:P&G, sterns and Fosters. Ge had just started. Ge. Yep, and there was also a place called Philip Carey that made shingles, and Fox Paper Company and other. They made the playing cards.
Speaker 4:Yes.
Speaker 5:And that little town had, let's see, 5,000 people and 15,000 jobs. I mean, there was jobs everywhere there.
Speaker 2:Yep. That was a ghost town, by the way, there is so many people from right here in this area of Kentucky that went there. Yeah, and then some, you know, some of them come back and it was weird. Yeah, my grandpa, you know, went back to Union College down here. Good friend of mine he's like yeah, my, my papa was from Knox County, right here in Barberville. I came back to Union College played baseball. So they come back.
Speaker 3:Yeah, they do come back.
Speaker 5:Yeah, a lot of that, but anyway. So I knew everybody in the town and I was an athlete in high school, so I knew everybody in all Because Lachlan we had a working class, everybody worked the factory. Then we had a north end where it was the, the proctor, gamble and ge stern foster executives, and then we had our west lakland side, so we had like a little triangle of different people and and I don't know cult, I want to say cultures, but I guess it was because you had the appellations. You had, uh, I don't know where the North Lackaw people were from actually, and then we had our black community. So it was like three different towns there.
Speaker 3:So a lot of interesting things went on there, I'm sure.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, what's the population when you were patrolling? How many people lived out there then?
Speaker 5:I think it was like 5,000. And now it's under. I think it's under three now. It's a ghost town Wow.
Speaker 3:Well, all the factories have gone.
Speaker 5:Yeah, yeah, all the business is gone, because only the other business were there, because the factory was there, so they're gone. It really is like a ghost town.
Speaker 2:Yeah, how close are you to the IKEA that we have to go to all the time? About miles up?
Speaker 5:yeah, I've been right there when you come south and you go between those walls. That's where Lachlan is ah, I gotcha right next to rating yes, correct.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I've been to Colerain some, I had a friend that lived up there and hmm. But I don't know the greater Cincinnati area that good besides, like Boone County and Florence and stuff.
Speaker 5:Yeah, it was pretty much, which is just the first 12 miles of Cincinnati. And then you hit four different like Loughlin, evenedale, sharonville and then Westchester, and then the other way to go is 71. Yeah, wow. And then you hit four different like Lachlan, evandale, sharonville and then Westchester, and then the other way to go is 71.
Speaker 2:Yeah, wow.
Speaker 5:Hmm, anyway. So yeah, I was there and did my time as patrolman and then you know the little town there. When you used to catch a case, it was your case. You worked it from start to finish. Yeah, I mean, it was then later. If you had difficulty, it was like a, uh, somebody who would be assigned detective. I wound up getting that, getting that later, uh, but a lot of times I you get your case, you just work it that's how a lot of our cases we get to work from start to finish.
Speaker 4:But if it's something big I mean like a big burglary, big monetary value of stabbing or shooting or something it's one of those you do the initial and then hand it off.
Speaker 3:But but how many officers were on the street at that time mark when you were there?
Speaker 5:oh, we, uh.
Speaker 2:well, I think we only had 17 guys when I started, so it's 5,000 people, but they were policing probably all the people coming to the factories that lived at their places. Right, Is that how that?
Speaker 5:kind of went. Yeah, for the most part we had. Well, the chief was there in the daytime all the time, but most days we would have two on the road, but then probably two or three times a week we'd have three, you know, depending on vacations and how the ship was working, whatever, but for the most part it was two guys. Well, you know, unlike being in Kentucky where you have the, you know, you guys call them counties down there we call them cities, but you know, ratty and Wyoming, they're literally a minute and two minutes away. They're literally a minute and two minutes away. So, even though we had our own little community to serve, the other police departments were so close. It wasn't like we couldn't handle it.
Speaker 3:If you needed help, they'd come and do whatever, like a mutual aid thing.
Speaker 5:Oh yeah, correct. Sometimes the mutual aid guy would get there before your guy would get there, yep.
Speaker 4:Was there a high call volume or high call volume there?
Speaker 5:well listen so we were one of the smallest communities, actually, because we went down to a village and we later on, because we used to have our own dispatchers and so they were on there during the daytime too. But and it was a full policeman who answered the phone in case somebody came on station, and it was always the older guys that got to do that, or I should say, had to do that. Yeah, yeah, I never got to answer the phone.
Speaker 4:Yeah.
Speaker 5:But then we switched over to the Haymore County Communication Center when the 911 system came out and we wound up getting the most calls of anybody they had. I mean, there were townships that were five times our size and we would get more calls. That's interesting. But you know, I said we had i-75 going right too, so you had the accidents that could match a lot of people, you know. And we had, uh, like I said before, the phone, even though our little town was 80 percent locked. It was 80%. White Lincoln Heights was the biggest all-black community in the United States back then, and so we had people traveling back and forth from Cincinnati and so we always had calls. We were busy all the time.
Speaker 3:Did Lincoln Heights have their own police department?
Speaker 5:Yes, now they're patrolled by the Hamilton County Sheriff's Department now, but they disbanded. But yes, they had their own, okay, and they only had two guys on too, most of the time.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 5:And, like I said, because of Mutual Aid, we would back them up a lot. Yeah.
Speaker 2:So you went to. How long did you do? Were you there before you went to the county?
Speaker 5:no, I was in the county first okay, I got and then I went there yeah, for the in 84 to 96, 97, somewhere in there, when I won, when I won my job back and then and then retired that's still.
Speaker 4:That's. That's. That's amazing.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's awesome and, by the way, the official thing was I retired.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man, it's a good feeling to retire, isn't it, doug? It is yes. I'll let y'all know in about 30 years.
Speaker 3:If you can put up with it that long. If I can put up with it that long.
Speaker 4:If it don't keep changing man with it that long, if it don't keep changing. Man, so I've been. I've tried to read through some of your crazy cop stories that you put on Facebook. Did most of those happen in Laughlin.
Speaker 5:Or surrounding, yes, okay, well, I think some of them. You saw chases I would chase somebody into Lincoln Heights, or I think two of them I've already posted were actually in Arnican Heights, which is next door. The house fire one and, if you remember, the pizza one, those were both Arnican Heights, next door to me.
Speaker 2:You care to share some of the stories with us on this, so we can promote that on your Facebook too. So let's hear some of them well, the, the, the fire one.
Speaker 5:So we get a daytime call to a fire and we get there and it was in the other town next to me and we pretty much got there at the same time and this house was fully engulfed and there's some lady on the second floor yelling out a window I need help, I need help. And she had to wait 275, 300, easy. And so in those little towns they had their own fire departments, which is great at night because everybody's home, but daytime they're not, everybody's not there. So you could be a while for a daytime fire. Uh, because there was no full-time firefighters. I think it's working or something. Yep.
Speaker 5:And so we get there and, and I don't know, I read I'm looking around the back door to try and see, and that's on fire too. I happen to see a ladder on a neighbor's house, so I just grab it right around the front. We both climb up the top. We're trying to help us. Yeah, she goes. I'm not going without my cat. I'm like get out here, come on, it's going. I'm not leaving without my cat. I'm like, oh my god. So I said get out of the way. So I jump in, I'm crawling because there's this smoke's rolling out and it's one of those things. And there was, one door was open and one was closed. I wasn't going to open another one because I was afraid of a flashover. We call them a back draft yeah, yeah, I was worried about that.
Speaker 5:So luckily I found that cat and I went out the window to the other policeman and then this lady. She was so big, I'm telling you, she almost couldn't fit through the window and there was no way. So he's grabbing her on her shoulders and I'm stuck with her fat ass, no way. So he's trying to. He's grabbing her on her shoulders and I'm stuck with her fat ass pushing her, trying to push her out the window.
Speaker 2:I got I got the.
Speaker 4:I got the bad end of that deal that's one of those days when you really start to rethink your career.
Speaker 5:Why did I go in? Where was the other guys down here that could have went in? She was my wife. I had to go through her to get out.
Speaker 5:So I mean we wind up pushing her out to get her out on the roof. And I'll be honest with you, I had lunch with the guy I'm sorry, drinks with the guy about three weeks ago when we were talking about this story and he's like, oh yeah, I remember that and we're talking about the cat and everything and she wouldn't leave. And I remember I said how did you know, I think when we got done, how the fire department just showed up and we're sitting on the roof but there was no way we're getting. She's going down that ladder and the house is seriously and I mean there's flames coming out of the windows, not smoke flames, and we're sitting on that roof. So I'm like fire department was up and I get down and I said do you know how they got her off their roof? Because I think I left and he don't remember he kind of thinks a running department came over with a fire bucket and got her out because the other two didn't lock it on it and didn't have one of those buckets.
Speaker 4:I don't think I never didn't know how to get off that roof and he didn't remember it either but she got out evidently oh yeah, yeah, she did, and so did her damn cat you don't see yeah you don't think about that, though, but you know heavier set people, there's some logistical issues on on if you've got to get out of the house quick and I think it's one of the things she she was so big, she lived on the second floor.
Speaker 5:I think she had an enabler, because I don't think she even got out of the house. I mean, there's no way that lady was going up and down those steps every day you end up with a what's eaten Gilbert Grape type of situation. Yeah, there's no way she was going up and down those steps every day. She had to be. Somebody had to be bringing her food. That was somebody's sugar mama.
Speaker 4:What's another one we got I?
Speaker 5:was telling you about so we're watching this house for a while and people used to just call me random because I grew up in the area like, hey, this guy is selling weed whatever he was selling by the pound, though we're watching. For a while we did a trash job on him, which means you go through the garbage and find some pie. But we're like, wait until he's got something. After watching him, so we start throwing him one day and he's got a little baby. He's got like I don't know five or six year old or something, and we start following and he keeps goes this other little town and he keeps getting out of the car, running through the house with a diaper bag, but even the kids in the car, and I'm like, oh my god, we're watching him make all these deliveries. I'm like, oh my God, we're watching him make all these deliveries. He was dropping off the pot or we're following him.
Speaker 5:We're like, okay, so go get a search warrant. He goes back home. We go in Okay, do the search warrant, go in, it's non-violent, he's got two kids there. We get in there, we find $4,000 or $5,000 in cash and a couple pounds of pot and we're sitting there. Well, the guy is wife work, second shift so he was always ordering food in. So the pizza guy comes in and we all this money on this table and he's living the pizza. He goes hey, you know, my wife's still at work, you care if I feed my kids, I got to pay for the pizza. I'm like, yeah, sure, go ahead. He grabs a $100 bill and hands it to the pizza guy and says keep the change. He said I ain't getting that money back. That little 17-year-old boy couldn't have been more happy.
Speaker 3:He was like, yeah, heck yeah, get the liver here more often, no joke.
Speaker 2:When you get out buddy.
Speaker 5:I said you know what you can keep it, that's worth the story. That's classic, but you know, like I said, every policeman that has 100 stories like that. They're all out there. I'm just stupid enough to put them on there. And like I, told Doug, they're the best ones. We can't even tell.
Speaker 4:That's a lot of it. We've always before a lot of these with our guests, especially guys that we've worked with.
Speaker 5:They sit down and say say well, what stories can we tell that you know ain't gonna get us indicted later and the statute of limitations ran out on mine, but I still got some friends who are working, so I can't, still can't do it yeah, you gotta watch for that too.
Speaker 4:You don't want to incriminate them.
Speaker 2:I've had several, I'm not going on there, I ain't going to prison for that. I was like come on, man, either tell them or I'm going to tell them, you get on here you start talking about it, you realize they're not as bad as what you think.
Speaker 3:I'd say a lot of the stuff we've done. It wouldn't you?
Speaker 4:operate in the gray.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it wouldn't. I think through it all, through this podcast and stuff and hearing some of these stories, it's been therapy, but it's also, you know, it's just good for to shed a light on the human side of policing. We didn't put ourselves in it. Somebody put us in this position to have to deal with your shenanigans and your stupidity. We're just the ones that answered the call.
Speaker 5:Yeah, you show up where you're told, and all of a sudden stupid stuff happens it always amazes me.
Speaker 4:You know the cops that think outside the box on stuff, on how to handle stuff. They'd be like, well, I wouldn't have thought of that. They solved the problem in a way that I would have never thought.
Speaker 2:Everybody's got their own way.
Speaker 5:That was one of my stories. Well, this had to do with pizza too. That was one of my stories. Well, this had to do with pizza too. So I had some connection because I worked in the county. I knew a lot of people. I quarterbacked a football team. I knew a lot of people in the city and the county and so I had a connection at Cincinnati Bell and this is days before the age of myself, here before caller ID and all that stuff you got nowadays. So, anyway, they're working on this homicide case before caller ID and all that stuff you got nowadays. So anyway, they're working on this homicide case.
Speaker 5:And one of the guys working on our department I didn't like too much and I was actually ordered not to work on this case actually, but anyway, there was a BCI, which is Bureau of Criminal Investigation, here in Ohio. He was also working on the case because it was a homicide and the detective that was working on our department asked me hey, I know you got this connection that says St Bill. They had his phone number that was supposed to help solve his homicide. And he said can you call your connection and get this address for us? I like, nah, I don't want, I don't want to wake them up, it's just, it's it's after midnight. Um, now, and then the other guy I like to be ci investigator. He came in smart, can you, can you get this number for us? I go okay, let me see what I can do.
Speaker 5:So I really didn't want to because I had the person I had to call I had to didn't have to call in and get the number and then get called back. And you know, I didn't want to because the person I had to call didn't have to call in and get the number and get called back and I didn't want to go through all that stuff. So I'm sitting there and I'm like, okay, and it just popped in my mind because I'm thinking outside the box. So I pick up the phone and in Cincinnati there's a place called La Rosa's Pizza. They always advertise 347-111 pizza.
Speaker 5:So I call there's a place called La Rosa's Pizza and they always advertise 347-111-14-PIZZA. So I call, I got the phone, the guy gives me the phone number, I pick up, he walks into the other room and I walk in and I call the pizza. I said hey, I want to order a pizza. He said what's your phone number? I gave it to him. He said okay, just know what I moved, what address do you have? And they gave me the address, that's awesome, that is awesome.
Speaker 4:That is definitely thinking outside the box.
Speaker 5:So I literally went back in to that BCI guy and in one minute he gave him that address. He goes hey, Mark, I'm sitting back here. What did you do? I back here, what'd you do? I said what do you mean? He said you didn't have time. No one had time to you called somebody. They didn't have time to call and have somebody else get that number and call you back. How'd you do that? I said I can't get away with my sources, man, laughter a magician never reveals his tricks.
Speaker 4:That's right, that's awesome. So you had two cases that ended up on America's Most Wanted, or two perks, well, two perks.
Speaker 5:The one guy I'm just waiting to say this Well, yeah, I think one's dead. He got killed after they aired it that night. Oh wow, he was driving from. I always forget. I think he was driving from Lexington to Louisville or Louisville to Lexington. He had a shootout with a policeman. Well, the official.
Speaker 5:The official story was he did himself, but I think it was just protection because he was a uh big wig and a motorcycle gang and uh, yeah, a couple, couple running, because you know those motorcycle guys always have their main, they call them the main squeeze. Their girlfriend was from our town. You know most of the guys always have their main. They call them the main squeeze.
Speaker 5:Their girlfriend was from our town and a couple of thirds of his guys. So one day I got information and he was actually on there for attempted murder of a Sharonville policeman. He got in a fight, took his gun away, tried to shoot him and luckily it didn't fire.
Speaker 1:And he got put in jail and they made a mistake and he got out.
Speaker 5:So he was out running around and we knew his main girlfriend was in our town. So one night this will be a quick one I set up. I said, okay, here's where he's at. It's a one-way street in my neighborhood. I'm seriously behind my house where I grew up and down three doors. I know this neighborhood. There's a dead-end street. So I'm sitting back there in the back and I got another officer coming up because he could only go down the dead end street and make a left because the other two were dead in. I said, well, when you only lover will have him cornered. I'm sitting there thinking like this is the worst plan ever, because when, when the other guy pulls in front of him, please pulls the front he's getting his gun out. And this guy's coming out with a gun and they're both pointing to me and I said this, this is not, this is not good at all. And so I said okay, stay here, just in case this comes out, I'll circle back around. And I made a phone call and then I wound up that the guy somehow he got information that we were there and he wound up backing back out the one-way street. That's how he got away that night. That was a good thing.
Speaker 5:And then another one. So I get information from somebody and says, hey, this guy is, he's on the FBIS-1 list but he's got fake ID and everything and he's on an airplane down to New Orleans to meet with the sons of somebody down in, our sons of whatever it is down New Orleans. Uh, blacker gang, down there he's with the president, the vice president. They're wearing their colors, he's wearing a suit. He doesn't have his gun on him. I'm like, okay, so I'm just locking a little small town community. I called down to New Orleans and talked to some guy. Hey, look, this guy is on his plane and he's wearing colors. He's not wearing colors. The other two guys are wearing colors. I said just catch him when he gets off the plane. Well, this sergeant I talked to down there stops the plane on the tarmac, gets everybody off, but the two guys in colors. So he walked out, he got away. The chief calls me on Monday and says Mark, did you have an airplane stopped in New Orleans? I said I said he goes, what are?
Speaker 5:you doing? I said he goes. What are you doing? I said, listen, he's the most wanted guy in the country right now and I had information that he was there and I can prove it and luckily I was able to verify that my information was correct and he was on the plane. But still to get called in by the chief like what are you doing? You're a policeman, I'm stopping an airplane to do our leave. What are you doing? You're a policeman, I'm stopping airplanes in.
Speaker 4:New Orleans. You got to do what you got to do.
Speaker 5:Yeah, yeah. And the other guy was oh, this is Chris. Guys, so I'm making a drug arrest and, besides being the 21 Jump Street, I rarely arrested juveniles. It was too much paperwork. I didn't like going to juvenile court. They most times didn't plead out. I didn't like to arrest juveniles.
Speaker 5:It's still a giant pain in the butt, yeah, and so I usually didn't. I'd take them home, warn them, whatever. So I'm arrested this morning about maybe 14, 13. He was selling crack and some of the little kids had to be six, seven, eight and he knew I was. First of all, he should know who I was. But he did.
Speaker 5:And he comes up, grandma's crush, telling me what to do and tossing at me. I'm like, get away from me. Who are you? He says I know who you are, you can do this. And I'm like, god, what is this kid? And so I got his name and I remember he stopped it and gave the other kids like, hey, man, here's a dollar. I heard he won't give you bus fare when I let you out. I'm like, what are you talking about? So I'm like, okay, I don't know what this kid is, but I guess it was. That was the prototype. Huh, yeah, so.
Speaker 5:So I go to school the next day and a guy I graduated, which was a, I think, assistant principal there or something. I said, hey, you have the antichrist coming up, because what I'm telling you this kid is I. And I've arrested his mom too because she had a crack house and I went in there one time and she didn't have a power on with this baby, shouldn't have the baby, but anyway, um, it goes years. I don't see him again. I don't know where he went to. He must have left lakland anyway.
Speaker 5:So I'm driving down the street one day in lincoln heights and all of a sudden somebody else left the police and I about locked my car up, throwing it, throwing in park to get out. And I and and this was Jackson street, lincoln Heights, which was crack capital back then, I mean it was one of the biggest places anywhere in Ohio, probably anywhere by crack they were just lined up and I jump out and I said, hey, who wants to F me? And it was like it was like the movie Meatballs Everybody backed up except this one guy. I looked around and backed up and he just stood there and I walked to him. I said, hey, you want to know he goes? No, I said what's your name?
Speaker 5:And he told me I said yeah, I locked your mom up too. I remember you now and I kind of told him I kind of unjustly I unjustly meant a lot more than I should have, honestly but I was training a guy that day and this guy was a big guy, about a 6'8 guy, and I remember him saying that is the coolest thing I've ever seen. We all just took a step back and just four kids standing there. And then so, last word, a couple more years I'm watching TV. We all just took a step back and just four kids standing there. And then so, after a couple more years I'm watching TV like sure enough, he's wanted for three different murders, one in Ohio, one in Illinois and he came back to Ohio and murdered somebody else wow, wow that was a happening town up there sounds like oh yeah, like I said, we were the most, we were the busiest in Hanwell County.
Speaker 5:That's crazy, that is unbelievable.
Speaker 3:And by the way.
Speaker 5:I worked there because I had kids and I liked coaching my kids and being with my kids so I would trade all my first. We had rotating shifts but I traded all my first and seconds for the third shift so I could be off and coach the kids and be there Second shift. You can't make any games First shift. You miss all the school stuff. So, yeah, I worked permanent third by choice, but that's where all the action was.
Speaker 3:Yeah, that third shift is a hard shift, though.
Speaker 5:Oh yeah, it takes two on your body.
Speaker 2:It does. Me and Doug worked plenty of night shifts together. We did, yes, had a ball we did.
Speaker 5:Yeah, that's the best thing about career on thirds yeah, that's the best thing there's no supervisors either no, and you just have brass and just having to be good friends with the supervisor. That's right the plus yeah we well, you know, most of the time time later in my career not even later, even younger I was usually one in charge, because all the old guys liked to work the dispatcher and then the other old guys liked to trade off for a shift. So most of the time I was the OIC.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I remember going back to the F the police. I remember one time this juvenile up at the school I was working he had a tattoo. For some reason he decided to put F the cop. So I knew it was for me. I had to deal with him a bunch and he came out there and I guess the assistant principal said, hey, he's got a new tattoo that's got your name all over it. And I was like, oh, I looked at it and sure enough he did F the cop right above his mom Mom.
Speaker 2:I love mom tattoo. Is that serious?
Speaker 4:Choices were made. They weren't good ones, but choices were made.
Speaker 2:I was like, wow, I've rated higher than mom on that one. I was like I guess the regrets. Now I hope you got it covered.
Speaker 4:We just arrested a guy the other day that has F the police tattooed down his spine. Wow Of course they took pictures why?
Speaker 5:would you know, I wonder if his boyfriend in prison put that on him.
Speaker 4:He's definitely holding somebody's pocket right now.
Speaker 3:It's funny, so do you miss it mark uh, yeah, I mean it was.
Speaker 5:I say this and unfortunately for my brother office, today, they, they can't have the fun that we used to oh no no, no, I mean I'd have my own TV show or be in jail myself.
Speaker 4:No, we've talked about that many times. I started in 2016 and it's changed so much just from then, let alone from what it used to be prior to that. It's not the same job anymore.
Speaker 5:No, not even close, and back then we had pretty much full support and Kentucky's still strong, but Cincinnati's a disaster right now.
Speaker 4:Oh yeah, yeah, I couldn't imagine. Yeah, we've been pretty lucky, pretty blessed to be. I mean you've got a lot. You know you're a loud minority, but the majority is still pretty well.
Speaker 2:I heard a protest today while I was working. They were out. The elderly bunch were protesting the new Big, beautiful Beagle. It was all in their 70s and 80s out there holding a coffin up. What are they protesting it for? I guess they think they're going to lose their Social Security.
Speaker 4:They protest all the time up there I was just like, wow, that's 78 hauling a coffin around.
Speaker 2:I was like, well, they don't quite get ready to have to use that thing. I hope it's a good one.
Speaker 4:It's like the old couple that I dealt with the other day. They're like 75, both of them they're fighting and feuding, wanting a divorce. Wanting, I mean domestication.
Speaker 3:I was like if y'all just wait a couple years, you won't have to worry about none of this. Just let nature take its course.
Speaker 4:Yeah, you go to your room, you go to yours.
Speaker 2:So what year did you retire in then?
Speaker 5:96. So what year did you retire in? Then uh, 96, but I, uh, I had a year off, where then I won my job back in 97, and then that's when I started but then you, uh, then you kind of went into your own business, is that right? Yeah, I created a little sports uh morning goods item. I did pretty well on.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 5:So what's so? Whenever girls play sports, they always roll their t-shirt sleeves up. Oh yeah, I got a patent little Basically. It's a Velcro strap that wraps around and holds the sleeves up, and we put soccer balls on them, softballs on them.
Speaker 4:Wow, that's awesome. I never thought of that, but I mean, that's how you make money.
Speaker 2:Thinking of something somebody needs.
Speaker 5:I think we sold like 8 million of them. Oh my gosh Geez, dumb cop gets lucky.
Speaker 2:I would. I'm dumber, I'm going to make billions. I wouldn't say that's gotta be a way. I'm gonna make billions. I wouldn't say that's too dumb created a product that sold millions.
Speaker 5:Well, congratulations yeah, it was fun, right. What's my wife doing with me the whole time? I don't know how she put up with it, but she did she's a good and I love her to death yep you got some good youngins too.
Speaker 3:I love them today well, I'm on.
Speaker 5:Jury's still out on them for me you get to be.
Speaker 3:I mean, I heard you're getting ready to be a new grandpa yeah, I am now.
Speaker 4:The grandkids are awesome I love them oh my gosh well, would you go back and do it all over again?
Speaker 3:if the situation was different.
Speaker 4:The kid part no the police policing I don't know if we want you to answer the kid part.
Speaker 2:They may listen to this podcast.
Speaker 5:Yeah, the police thing. Yeah, it was fun and it was entertainment and it was always doing something.
Speaker 4:Front row seat to the greatest show in the world.
Speaker 5:Yep, you know it's funny because I got to the point and Nala can get on me if she listens to this because she's egotistical. Sometimes I am, but sometimes I felt like I was putting on a show for those residents here. I was like I was always chasing people and just doing stupid stuff, like I'd go down the street, one-way street, the wrong way a lot, because the dope boys were always looking the other way. That's right, used it to your advantage. Did I pull up and I just stand there with them? They didn't know what they like. They can't make no money. I sit there like, well, I'm either gonna pull away and then I'm gonna get called here. I'm just gonna stand here and make them leave.
Speaker 4:That's awesome.
Speaker 2:It's fun stuff.
Speaker 3:Did you ever have any problems, any fights with anybody or anything like that?
Speaker 5:Oh my gosh, yeah, a lot. I put one on the one. On the one on the crazy cop thing. I put that one on there For some reason, I don't know why, I chased a lot of people. I'm talking the one on the crazy cop thing. I put that one on there. But yeah, if for some reason, I don't know why, I chased a lot of people, I'm talking, you know if, if a policeman, I would guess most places, if you're in a real full pursuit, I know what people, what do you? What do you think somebody does a career 10 or 15. Yeah, yeah, I, I well above 50, 50 to 75.
Speaker 3:Wow, I was chasing people.
Speaker 5:And same with car chases. I mean, I mean real car chases where you're going, well, you can't do any more, like 100 miles an hour or flying through. You know, back then you could go, you could run through, I mean with caution, stop signs and red lights and stuff, you know, with your sirens and lights on. But I was in. We also had 75 going right down there, so I had a bunch of those involved, but I was always in. I don't know. Just because we're working third shift.
Speaker 3:Yeah, third shift was a. That's when that criminal element is most active.
Speaker 4:And if you were a proactive officer, then that's I mean that plays the most part of it. If you're out there looking for it, you're going to find it.
Speaker 5:It is yes, oh, yeah, yeah, and then, when you weren't looking for it, it'd find you.
Speaker 4:That's exactly right. When you're trying to take a break, it falls in your lap.
Speaker 2:No rest for the wicked Episode two with me and Doug.
Speaker 5:Go ahead, I'm listening, oh, go ahead. No, go ahead. I'm listening, oh, go ahead no, go ahead, go ahead.
Speaker 2:No, you need to go back and listen to episode two with me and doug and dylan, where we've gotten a car chase just accidentally it's.
Speaker 3:It's pretty classic okay, I'll do that, so I'll tell you what?
Speaker 5:I'll tell you one of my fights. So this younger officer in the police department next door I'm not gonna say his name, um, anyway, he's asking me how are you getting all these chases? All the time You're always running chasing somebody and foot chasing and stuff. I said I'm just out there, man. If you're out there, you know a lot of guys sit in the station. I'm out there, I get bored, I can't just sit in here all day.
Speaker 5:And so finally, about a week or two later, he first ever car chase and he's screaming on the radio like he'd never heard anything before. You know, I would be like finding a 31 in pursuit. I'd find a bunch of location, I'd say South by Wayne Avenue, approaching whatever car it was, and just keep calm about it. He's yelling and screaming like oh my God, you can't even tell him where I was. Well, I figure like okay, I know where this is going to wind up at, screaming like oh my god, you came. I couldn't even tell him where I was. Well, I figured like okay, I know, we're just gonna wind up at.
Speaker 5:So I go up that area, I'm sitting there here. It comes, he goes by me so he didn't know I'm there and they, they jump out and let the car roll, which you know. You gotta stay with the car and make sure it doesn't hit anybody else, for another car, whatever. So he had a little gap in there, so those guys take off running through these woods. So no one knows. I'm still there. I'm like a ninja, I'm, I'm following, I catch the first and the guys don't know I'm chasing them either. I catch the first guy, throw him over and I handcuff him to a fence and go after second guy. Don't even tell anybody I've done it yet, because he's still screaming on the damn radio, and so finally he's yelling down 5-11-31,. I'm in pursuit of male block and I got him to gunpoint and he's handcuffed to a fence.
Speaker 3:You'd already caught the guy.
Speaker 5:I already caught the guy handcuffed. Then he told me I was there and was on after the next guy and he switches over to channel two and starts cussing me out because channel two only goes like a half mile radius and channel one goes county wide Because he knew I was down Because his disappointment in that radio. I wish I had somehow got that back in the day.
Speaker 5:And he's got him a gun before he's already handcuffed to a fence. So so the other guy, the other guy gets over that fence and, uh, it's late, it's 4, 35 o'clock in the morning and it was a rumor. I said, hey, you guys go tell them where I was. Then I said set up a mirror. Hey, we're going to call in a dog. I'm like I'm not waiting on no damn talk. I mean, they come from Forest Park and they set up and it just takes forever. I'm like I ain't got time for this. It's not even my town anymore. It already started. It went through lock and end up in Lincoln Heights. I ain't, I ain't part of this, except I arrested that guy. So I'm like and you get here, you get here, and what are you gonna do? I said watch this. I yell, release the dog. I go. Guy gets up and takes off to the gate asking to get out, before the dog got there. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2:Fun stuff.
Speaker 5:That's great. Like I said, if you want a quick solution to something, find the laziest guy, because I just wasn't waiting. That's exactly right.
Speaker 4:That reminds me we talked about juveniles, dealing with them. Not want to deal with them, but I just thought of this story. We, uh, we had a problem with juveniles running off from was it sunrise, sun, sunlight, whatever it was. They'd run off all the time. They had this group there and they was. Every time we deal with them. They was the mouthiest. I mean, they just knew that we couldn't do anything with them and and you can't. And then so we get in foot pursuit of them and they run across how rogers parkway and they run down in the woods. Well, we'd been down in the woods and we, so we jumped the guardrail and they're running down down that way. We just stop because there's a string of barbed wire fence about chest high that they didn't see. And we do a pat, we just stop. Clothes lining, clothes lining. And they're yelling F you pigs. All this stuff you'll never catch them.
Speaker 2:Good for them, that's funny you'll ever catch some of them, good for them. Oh, that's funny. Well, this has been a fun podcast. I really appreciate it.
Speaker 5:Oh, no problem, I'd love to bring up some of the old memories. Oh yeah, well, that's what it's all about.
Speaker 4:That's what I mean. We got into this to tell these old stories. When I started, everybody told me said you need to write down, and kind of diary, these stories and encounters. And I would say that for everybody anybody starting out or anything to write these things down Because, you're right, every cop has a million of these stories and it's hard to remember them all. But when you do finally sit down and start talking with other cops or friends and bring them all up, I mean you can go on for hours and it's they're always funny and always, always fun to listen to that's what I started doing.
Speaker 5:My crazy cop stories was like I said I need to put some of this stuff down somewhere my grandkids are reading on or something.
Speaker 4:Yes, yeah yeah, that's uh that's what we can. We can do with this podcast A lot of our, I mean. If nothing else, it's at least a record of all these stories that we can go back and listen to and people can pass on and not be forgotten.
Speaker 5:Any officers listening? I wouldn't suggest writing it all down, because you'd wind up getting indicted too.
Speaker 4:Well, that's true. Yeah, you've got to be selective. Some stuff that only you and Jesus need to know about that's funny.
Speaker 3:Later on in the academy, I think they kind of wanted you to keep a journal. Yeah, and I know Jason Van Hook, he'd write everything down.
Speaker 4:Yeah, he had notebooks full of stuff, of funny stuff. Yeah, we'd. We'd always joked around at the pd of of making a a bathroom book and it was just each. Each story is just exactly one poop long of all our police stories, Long stories.
Speaker 2:your legs go numb yeah. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 4:Well, Mark, we've enjoyed it. I've thoroughly enjoyed it.
Speaker 5:Your stories are hilarious Thanks for having me on. If you ever need a follow-up, give me a call?
Speaker 4:Absolutely yeah, we'll call you back. If you think of some more, we'll reload and restart again.
Speaker 3:Might even make a road trip.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we'll come up.
Speaker 5:Oh, that would be fun, or you could come down here either one. Oh, you know what I could do, that maybe.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 4:You're not in Mount Vernon.
Speaker 3:Yeah, just uh you just about 20 minutes. Yes, we're not far from that. You was here once before. What did you come down when dad passed away?
Speaker 5:no, I think Donna did. I don't know if I was out of town. Donna did no, you were at the funeral home, I believe was I yeah, I believe so yes, I remember them, damn cop stories, but I can't remember the rest of my life.
Speaker 3:Well, I can't remember what I had for lunch today so, oh my gosh, that's the way it goes. When you was talking about I can't find that text I said I think it was a response on one of your stories and then you said oh yeah, that's right, I'm old, it's funny.
Speaker 5:I'll tell you this quick. I did a concrete job on my sidewalk last week, and a buddy of mine same age as me, we're out there. It took us five hours work combined, but we wasted probably I don't know a good 30 minutes each. We'd put something down a pencil or a hammer or a damn tape measure and we'd spend half the time looking around for stuff that was right there.
Speaker 3:That's when you know.
Speaker 2:Either you know it, it or you hire it it got done.
Speaker 4:You don't have to worry about the journey, it's about the destination okay well, guys, thanks again for having me yeah, that was fun.
Speaker 3:Thank you so much yeah, mark, come down and see us sometime, alright see you, be safe guys.
Speaker 5:Alright guys, hope you all enjoyed that down soon I'll keep doing that, all right, see you. See you, mark. Take care, be safe guys. You too.
Speaker 4:All right guys. Hope you all enjoyed that. We'll catch you on the next one. I took the pretty side.